I work in the tech industry. I’m also a white guy, which makes many things silently, invisibly easier.
It took me a while to truly internalize this. To the extent that I naturally notice disparate treatment at all, my instincts often tell me that this is the way things ought to be, and that any deviation from this “default” is noticeable, uncomfortable and frightening. For many years I’ve struggled with this.
If the system is already unfair in many little ways, many of which are effectively impossible to correct, the best we can do is attempt to balance the scales in other ways.